Finding A Partner
How To Deal With Rejection
If you want to have any chance of finding the right partner for you, then your going to need to learn how to handle your fair share of rejection. Plenty more fish in the sea as the saying goes!
Being rejected is something that everyone goes through. How you deal with rejection from a man or woman is the difference between a life that you want and a life that you wish you had.
Picture the scene, you have met the sexiest man/woman ever and you don’t know what they think of you.
Do you :
a) Tell them that you like them.
b) Keep it to your self.
If you are likely to go with the latter choice, then your fear is going stop you from meeting someone that you deserve to be with. Learning how to deal with rejection is key to turning things around.
Why wouldn’t you tell them?
Let me imagine just a few of the possible thoughts that may run through your head:
- I’m too fat
- I’m not as sexy as (someone else you know)
- They are out of my league
- I don’t feel in the mood
- They’ll laugh at me
- I’m not worthy of being with them
This list could go on forever (feel free to comment with your own thoughts). Its a good idea to take a few moments to write down your own list and take a good look at it – Then you’ll at least know in advance what goes through your head when this does actually happen in real life. Preperation really helps with this.
If you take any list like this, and whittle it down, what you are left with is basically a battle between you and your own sense of worth.
The truth is that when you strip away social status, we are all human. We all share the same common thoughts and emotions.
If you fail to act of how you feel, and instead bottle it up, then you are going to do yourself damage over time. In the short term, you’ll regret not talking to them, and in the long term, it could become a habit, so that you are rejecting yourself long before you even get in the same room as someone you like.
If you take the time to think about it, you will realise that its not possible to be rejected by anyone other than yourself.
So what if they don’t like you? It doesn’t mean that you failed at life – just that neither of you is in the same place in life at that point in time. Maybe that will change, maybe it won’t, but if you don’t try you’ll never know either way!
Or to put it another way – A chance isn’t a chance unless you take it.
Can you see how a rejection from someone can spiral into something that is not about them at all? This for me highlights the importance of living the life you want to live, and not a life that means living up to the values and expectations of others.
If you behave as the person that you want to be, then rejection becomes meaningless, because you are no longer trying to fit into something that you are not.
Learn to look through the lens from a different perspective. You are looking for someone to fulfill your needs, and there is more than one person in the world that can do that, but ultimately the satisfaction that you are searching for comes from within. Look for it there, and then you will still get rejected, but you won’t care either way when it happens..
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